You Do What You Love and Fuck the Rest

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So on Sunday I sat down, pulled my cards and laid out a Celtic Cross spread. I got through two cards before I decided that I wasn’t feeling it. Today was a different story. I was sitting on the couch before I had to sign back into work, with my husband’s head in my lap and him stretched out, relaxing. My cards were just on the table right beside me so I picked them up. I shuffled them some and started flipping, only intending to get to know the cards.

Before I knew it, I was sucked into a reading. I’ve described it below.

I should maybe give a little background. I’m leaving my current job in just over a week. After that, I start a new job where I will be working from home. Very excited, this girl is. It’s kind of a scary thing and I am doing my best to work though it. These past few weeks, and especially days I have been working through some major stuff. Today is the first time in a while I’ve really felt at peace. I spent a good chunk of the afternoon in the (hot!) sunshine. I was sweating something fierce but boy did it feel good.

Earlier in the morning, I was feeling blah. I read an article yesterday which mentioned journaling your fears, so I thought I’d give that a try. I didn’t get far before going downstairs to relieve some stress ;) . Anyhow. When I came back up it was 11:22. One of my favorite times to catch on the clock. It’s very rarely a day where I don’t find myself glancing at the clock and it happens to be 11:11 or 11:22. It’s a nice feeling. When I went to check my timer for work, it was stopped at 8:08.

I checked Doreen Virtue’s Angel Numbers and this is the message for a combo of 8′s and 0′s:

“A message from your Divine Creator, signifying that the impending endings are part of your overall Divine plan. They are answers to your prayers, and in alignment with God’s will for you. Ask God to help allay any fears or worries you may have about these upcoming changes.”

It was very relieving, and I did just what she suggested. I wrote a little prayer to spirit to help me to transition through the next few weeks.

When I went to stop this same timer, it stopped at 13:13. So, I checked the same page and here was the message for 1′s and 3′s:

“The ascended masters are working with you on your thought processes. In many ways, they are acting as mentors, teaching you the ancient wisdom involved in manifestation. They are sending you energy to keep you from feeling discouraged, and encouragement to stay focused on the true goals of your soul. Additionally, the ascended masters may be offering you advice, guidance, and suggestions on your life purpose. Always, however, they teach that every creation begins at the level of thought and idea. Ask them to help you choose wisely that which you want.”

This was very interesting, because when I was down in the basement earlier I had just been thinking about how I don’t seem to manifest what it is I want. Maybe that’s because I don’t have a good picture of what it is I want. (This is touched on in the reading I did.) I was thinking earlier that I needed to pay more attention to my thoughts and focus only on the positive. I wasn’t doing that this morning. My frame of mind was stuck in lack and I couldn’t transition over to abundance… that is until I saw these messages from my guides and angels. These signs are not always visible to us, but our angels are always there. It would serve me well to remember that.

Anyway, on to the reading!

I pulled the 6 of Pentacles, the Page of Wands, the Devil, the 5 and 6 of Wands and the 5, 6 and 7 of cups. I didn’t pull them in that order, but rather was guided to form groups with the cards. The 6 of Pentacles carries the main theme of the reading – knowing when to lead and when to follow, when to be the student  and when to be the teacher, when to talk and when to listen, when to give and when to receive, etc.

The first pair was the Devil and the Page of Wands. The Page of Wands is all about following your passion where the Devil has its roots in the material world or what we might call 3D. Following your passion and creating with love is central to 5D. The page says to get out there, take a risk and give it your all. Get to be an active participant in life. With the pairing of the Devil, it may be difficult to find your passion. You may know your passion abut feel held back or tied down in some way – financially, emotionally, socially, etc. Stop focusing on what you can’t do and start to do what you are able to. One of the best pieces of advice my mom ever gave me was “you can only do what you can do.” And if you don’t know what it is to do, do nothing. Take some silent time to get to know yourself. Be open to receive the inspiration from your Higher Self.

Next the 5 of wands shows that others will probably disagree with you. They’re going to think you’re crazy. They’re going to doubt you. They’re going to criticize you. There may even be others who feel you are intruding on their turf, that you are there to compete with them. You need to have a good sense of Self in order to ignore everything negative they say to you!* Only you know what is right for you, and what you need to do. Regardless of how much effort you put in trying to please folks, someone will always be upset. Why waste the energy into pleasing others and compromising too much of yourself when someone is going to be upset anyway? To quote Steve Carell in Little Miss Sunshine:


Another reason why it’s necessary to have a good sense of Self is to hold your head high and know what you are doing is right for you when others are giving you grief. Take pride in yourself, but be sure it’s not unfounded pride. That what, when you ride into a cheering arena you will know they are cheering for all the good you’ve done. Others will see that the only way forward is to Love and then you will be a teacher.

Finally, there’s the 5, 6 and 7 of cups.

Once you master the energy of the 5 of wands, and walk with your head held high you will be a completely different person. You may feel as if you’ve suffered a big loss, and you likely have. That’s because you have. You’ve discarded so many old memories, so many outdated belief systems and replaced them all with Love. Once you realize this, you’ll feel empty never again. You will be so inundated with Love from all sides you almost won’t know what to do with you. But, the only thing you can do with it is give it to others. Until you realize it, you’ll feel a numb sort of hollowness inside. You feel like you’re missing something, but you don’t know what it is. You can’t quite put a finger on what’s wrong or what’s missing but you definitely feel it. You feel like you want to go back to when “things were easier.” Yes, it was far easier to stay asleep but it’s much more fulfilling to stay awake.

To overcome this, it helps to move into the energy of an innocence, as described in the 6 of cups. We have to be Love in action. The more Love you give the more you get. What a beautiful paradox. The more you share your joy, and your luck and your success and your hopes with others, the more the Universe pays you back because ultimately, as we are all one, you are giving to yourself. Once you move fully into this state of innocence, the whole Universe is at your fingertips. You can literally do anything you can imagine. This can be completely overwhelming with so many paths available. How do you know which one to choose? Only you can make that decision. No one path is better than the other. If you don’t like the one you are on, it is always an option to take the steps to change it at any time. No one else but you is able to do that, though! Perhaps the path you’re seeking isn’t visible yet because you need to get to know yourself a little more.

And then it was over.

Going back to the part of the reading where I had inserted an asterisk. While I was typing the reading out I had remembered an epiphany I had earlier in the day. I realized that every single person on this planet has a specific role to play. Every one has a unique talent, gift or service to be provided that no one else on Earth can do. I think a lot of my releasing lately has been dealing with who am I and what do I want to do. It worried me that I hadn’t figured everything out yet. But then I realized, that’s how it’s supposed to be. I look back to where I was a year ago – just married and enjoying a honeymoon at the ocean – and think of how much I’ve changed. I know things now that would have seemed impossible to me then. Each day I am getting a little bit closer to the “whole” person I am meant to be. I don’t know who that person is, or what she does but I know she’ll be pretty awesome.