The Snack
As I was eating lunch at like, two thirty, one of the nurses said that 'even the charge nurse of PACU has not had a chance to eat'. I thought it was Not Right that we would work under these conditions. And after intubating the patient in the Unit, I saw the Charge Nurse--she had been holding her pee for four hours, never mind lunch, she was so busy. Again, with my heart and soul I thought, Not Right!
About an hour later, downstairs, in the nursing lounge and also the desk in PACU, were fifty small orange juices with a bag of Trail Mix on top of each one. Sustenance. From the Big Nurse in Administration to show she knew everybody is working so hard. Although these were for nurses, and not for doctors, I am well-liked. A nurse gave me one.  And that was my dinner, until I got home to my cereal. I manifested this. I raised the signal with my heart center. Someone heard it. And that someone chose to act. 

New Codes Anchored into Martix of Moon, Great Central Sun.

Blessings

LynMarie8

I don't know what I'm writing when I start this. It has something to do with my heart feeling cold, though.

There's a positive and negative to everything. I haven't been meditating daily, like I know I should. I'm recogizing the differences now. Postive and negative. Dark and light.

When I don't meditate, I'm cold. I know I'm cold. My heart is cold and mine and that's it. I recogize others, but I don't really seeeeee them.

When I do meditate I am warm. I am kind. I am compassionate. I am miserable.

What?

You heard me, I am miserable.

That doesn't make sense.

When I do meditate, I am giggly and I am nice and I am warm, I am so warm. My heart is warm and soft. I wake up in the mornings and cry and cry and cry. I don't want to keep living in this 3D world. The thought of getting out of bed, and going out in 3D rattles me.

So when I don't meditate. I still smile. I'm still kind, but I am hard and cold.

It's not something I think that others notice the way I do. They still see the smile, they still get treated kindly. But not as kindly as they could.

I don't want to venture into that 3D world, but I have to.

When I don't meditate, I can get by. I don't have an aching feeling in my heart, a longing for something better.

What's worse? I'll tell you.

When I don't meditate, there's nothing pushing me. I'm "content", for lack of a better word. I don't realize that aching and longing, it's hidden inside of me. Buried in the layers of density from 3D living to keep it hiding from me, so it's not there to give me that motivation.

I don't want to go out in the 3D world, but I have to. I have to because someday, I won't have to.

Does that make sense?

Good.

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