DEEPLY AWAKE – SANDSTORMS
After Thanksgiving, I caught the cold going around our little family. One by one we each succumbed, and on Sunday night, I noticed it sidling up to me, but was already well within its influence.
I have spent many days deconstructed, fallow, quiet. Lots of sleep, lots of feeling uncomfortable and feeling swimmy, like I am in a dream. Not entirely unpleasant, but a state wholly incompatible with tidying up, doing chores, or putting on scrubs and going to work.
I have noticed within my awareness, over the last three weeks or so, that there are many things in my life coming to a close, or are close to exhaustion. I do not mean this figuratively. There are big, big changes ahead. I told Sam my random shopping list a couple days ago. It's as if every sector of our home, every sector of our living, needs some sort of outfitting. I'm not kidding. We only have one light working in his bathroom, neither of us have many clothes that fit us anymore, I have car issues, my job is not working out, Sam is not doing great in school, we are out of cat food, it's just all random and all loose ends and weird, final details. Imagine that all the goodies you rely on that you bought at Costco are gone, so many things must now be replaced.